Today we are going to celebrate, goddamn it. Yeah, this country largely sucks, the planet is doomed, a global pandemic is raging. That's all the more reason why we need to squeeze every ounce of joy out of this day.
Are you still numb or upset? Understandable! But I’m here to talk about joy: finding it wherever you can and treasuring it. Because we don’t stand a chance of saving this world if we can’t find joy first. JOY IS SURVIVAL. JOY IS BASIC. BE BASIC.
It’s not embarrassing or irresponsible to embrace this moment. Don’t believe it for a second. Misery is not righteous. Step into the sunshine and FEEL. IT. Stay as long as you humanly can. And then scour each day for more joy, fish it out of the rubble, milk it out of each moment, and savor the hell out of it. You deserve to feel good.
I swear to fuck I'm just going to spend the rest of the day mapping out the EXACT playlist of the enormous dance party I am going to host once this pandemic subsides. I will also be sniffing around online for some kind of deeply obscene and obnoxious outfit to wear at my enormous party, and I'll be inventing various themed drinks, some alcoholic and others not, for my obnoxious, vainglorious guests and their horrified friends to savor WHILE WE DANCE OUR EXHAUSTED, DISGUSTING BODIES INTO THE GROUND. Fuuuuuck yes. This is my to-do list. Send outfit and song suggestions, please. Must be slutty.
Rachel Syme recently shared her GIGANTIC dance playlist on Twitter. She asked her followers to recommend any songs that they felt compelled to dance to whenever they came on. I fully support you making your own, but if you need any ideas it's currently 2 days long: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5F9GpvntTBPdmjOyirKgdz?si=A5sDvGnJSWOFwfmu7ZDSMA
I have been preparing for this for MONTHS! The funny thing is, I love whingeing (I'm French after all) about how I am such an introvert and stuff but honestly... I just want to dance and throw some ridiculous glam-rock parties. I have had a fair amount of solo dance parties in my loungeroom. Also, as a frog living in the land of Oz, I feel like I need to send everyone in your side of the world some joy.
OH AND LET ME ALSO ADD that feeling joy in the moment sometimes depends on refusing to engage in unnecessary intellectual exercises that, when you take a minute to look more closely at them, aren't really bringing much of value to your life, at least not around the clock, every day. Are you a data analyst, for example? Are you personally in charge of strategizing for the DNC? Is the world asking you, repeatedly, WHAT WAS THIS ELECTION ABOUT ANYWAY? WHO MADE IT GO DOWN THIS WAY? WHOSE FAULT WERE THE MISTAKES AND WHO CAN TAKE CREDIT FOR THE VICTORIES? (If that's your boss saying that shit, please proceed accordingly.)
But for me? That's just Twitter. Do we need to be deeply engaged in a post-game analysis TODAY? After the four-year-long autopsy we've been living? No fucking thank you. We can just play loud music and dance, can't we? Or wrestle? Or hug a dog? Or sit in the sunshine? Motherfuckers LET'S DO THAT SHIT INSTEAD.
I'm sitting in a patch of sun on my balcony in a shockingly beautiful November day watching some 20-year-old girls down my alleyway singing 'Be OK' by Ingrid Michelson at the top of their lungs while dancing in their bras. Some guy is playing a saxophone further away and the smoke from someone's bong is diffusing beautifully. What I'm trying to say is that sometimes I love how the chaos strips things down. We're alive motherfuckers!
I'll keep you posted on important alleyway developments. For example- is the tuxedo cat really going to get that squirrel? Keep obsessivly refreshing the page every twenty seconds for updates.
My virtual writing class has been the biggest source of joy in my entire life. Week 1 my best friend and I both in our 30s quickly learned that the writing group was all 70+. It has been amazing. Their confidence with technology has grown (first meeting no one could figure out how to get their cameras on) and everyone’s writing is improving significantly. The teacher is 80 and the smartest person I’ve ever met. Yesterday, one of the men wrote something sexist. She schooled him in the kindest most graceful way ever. Everyone’s writing is improving so much. One woman, Barbara, wrote about leaving a failed engagement. She didn’t share much about the relationship itself and my feedback was Barbara, that story is so interesting. I want to know more about your relationship! This week she reread the same piece but had added that he was bad at sex. It was incredible. She was grinning. JOY.
When it came my turn to share, I had written something very personal (it’s a memoir class) I asked, “how can you publish something knowing you can destroy someone’s life with it?” My teacher, knowing I am recovering from a long illness, said frankly, “Don’t. Get better first”. The freaking humanity in this woman. Do you know many times writing professors have told me to screw everyone and publish? She has changed everything for me. I love her.
Oh wow. She really knows. I agree, too - you can't take that on. Find your bearings first. And if you ever write that piece, it needs to be something you're sure you're proud of. Publish other stuff first, save that one for later. I have lots of stories I'll never publish anywhere because of the damage those stories would do. The more you write about your life, the better your compass gets. Envious of this class, though, it sounds so. good.
I went for a long walk in my neighborhood on maybe the best day for changing leaves and we collected our favorites in a bouquet as we walked. The mail carrier shouted to us in a thick accent how beautiful the leaves were in the neighborhood. We had a stilted conversation about autumn where we each struggled to understand each other completely but also were totally connected in the joy of it.
Finding joy in watching the MAGA crowd cry. Aside from that, I feel raw as hell. But for a while the fascists seemed invincible, so I'm enjoying finding out they're not.
I can’t take it in fully just yet. My brain understands the positive outlook and flashes of hope come, but my body isn’t fully on board with the new reality yet. Maybe I’m waiting to see a news network make the official call? Is chyron gonna go the trick? Something small and potentially silly will make it resonate in my body. I’m looking forward to that!
I took joy in my body this week. I have been trying to punctuate this week's doomscroll with displays of audacious fun. I hosted a "please please nevada-georgia-arizona-pennsylvania" noon solo dance party in my kitchen, and then I posted a video of me dancing with my cat to reggaeton in my teeny tiny running outfit (because its 75 degrees and sunny!) while taking giant swigs out of a bourbon bottle. And based on the likes the post got, I think I actually have okay ass-shaking abilities?!! Which totally makes my week.
Little flashes of joy keep coming at me today, in the form of videos and emails from some of my favorite creators, in the form of random fun e-conversations, in the form of just a prevailing feeling that somehow, some way, it's gonna be okay. And this post is one of those little flashes, so I'm grateful for it and for you, Heather.
I'm loving it all, and it feels like feeling true hope for the first time in a LONG time. I don't know if today is an inflection point and things will start to get imperceptibly better and better from here, but that's kinda what it feels like. I can't account for it, but I'm doing my best to accept it and own it as best I can. It feels like finally getting some goshdarn work done today, for once. It feels like wanting to make and read and watch and play ALL the things. There's not time to do all that now; there never is--so for now I'm just going to keep taking in these flashes of joy, for as long as they keep coming, and keep on looking for them even when they're less obvious.
Thank you for this post! I needed it. When things started looking up, I immediately began thinking about how hard the next four years are still going to be. I think it's almost a form of protection, like if I feel happy or relaxed for one goddamn minute something terrible is going to slip by without me noticing. So I really needed to be reminded to take the joy as it comes.
It can become a habit to brace for the worst. I grew up inside that habit (hence the name of my first book, Disaster Preparedness) but I didn't understand just how much of a toll it was taking on my outlook, my body, my friendships, my entire way of life, until pretty recently. Sometimes you need to stare straight down the barrel of the most terrible shit ever to understand that you've got to make due with whatever this shit heap of a life happens to deliver on any given day. Rejoicing in the tiny things you care about is part of that. And look, another part of it is just letting yourself feel incredibly shitty, too. You can do both! The more I invite the shit in, and then invite the joy in, and invite whatever the fuck there is around in, the better I feel. Welcoming what's here, that's the only way. Staying protected and safe will eventually drag you under. What's intense is that you can find a tiny glimmer of joy in *any* moment. You just stop and try to welcome everything you see and feel. There's a lot there, but trust me, joy is always somewhere in there, too. xo
Well, for starters, Bolsonaro's son named his daughter "Georgia" in honor of the "traditionally republican state". So we are laughing our asses off about that. The Brazilian right wing is also VERY confused about the "vote fraud" in the US, because we use exclusively electronic voting machines in Brazil and they've been yelling for years about how they want paper ballots because they can't be frauded... People are also very happy someone played Brazilian funk music on Philly! https://twitter.com/eurenesilva/status/1324792305015029761?s=20
I've been listening to a lot of joyous disco music since yesterday in anticipation of Biden getting 270. Good Times! I Feel Love! Let's Groove! September! I Want Your Love! Also Whitney, which isn't disco but is dancetastic. I stan the Philly ppl in the streets dancing and wearing Gritty and mailbox costumes! May their lives and the lives of ALL the people who organized and phone banked and knocked on doors and registered voters and protested for BLM be long and prosperous and blessed!
Edit: I realise this is election-related joy purely, and maybe being far away it's easier for us to feel it? Anyway – I'm in the UK and most of my friends and I have been glued to CNN since Tuesday and we are SO, SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! One friend yesterday burst into tears at the thought of Kamala Harris being the first Black VP in the US, which also almost brings me to tears, just thinking about it; others have been staying up all night to watch the vote counts. When Georgia turned blue we went crazy with delight and played the Mountain Goats' 'Going to Georgia'. Our UK politics group has momentarily stopped debating the merits of Jeremy Corbyn (seriously, thank you for this). We've been passing around tweets and tik-toks and articles and developing crushes on John King. But most of all, I repeat, we are SO HAPPY for you. Joyously so. I know it's not been called yet and I know the next eleven weeks, never mind the next four years, will be far from easy. Even so – we are here with you every step and will be celebrating so hard with you.
Everyone in my family is getting Covid tested today so we can (hopefully) all see each other Sunday for the first time in many months. Today's results require celebration with loved ones. With any luck, there will be bloody mary's, and champagne, and bourbon and great food and football to be enjoyed. And hugs. Lots of motherfucking hugs.
I just learned that in England Kieran White has married Tilly Christmas. They are now Mr.& Mrs. White-Christmas. They met when they were 12. I love this so much I can hardly stand it.
Came here to say thank you, Heather, for the ups and downs throughout this entire year you have provided me with, as well as the presence and writerly joy you have provided your audience with since before I knew who you were. I keep sending people your articles and newsletters and links to places to buy your books because your voice is that resonant and important this year. Thank you a million times over and THANK YOU FOR CELEBRATING TODAY. I love you. That is all.
I spent the day driving around Grass Valley and Nevada City looking at the unbelievable fall foliage. It was psychedelic. We got some tea and listened to a Mahler symphony and some Freddie Hubbard jazz. A more low-key kind of celebration but one I won’t forget.
I discovered Sugarbee apples - which are amazing - and took a break from my work (home) to ride a Lime scooter down to the local bookstore, where I picked up a couple of books. Also stopped at the Italian market - chocolate - and am back home on this unseasonably warm MN day, hanging with my cats, while the cleaning person finishes the upstairs. Thanks for reminding me to be basic! I sometimes feel ashamed to admit it, but I feel like the Queen of Fucking Sheba in this very moment....
Oh, and our November surprise might be a new President, so how about them apples?!
For whatever reason, the rich sensations of what you describe stand out to me. The bright color, the cat fluffiness, the bookstore smell. The picture is more wholesome than a movie! Lime scooter! Joy!
I swear to fuck I'm just going to spend the rest of the day mapping out the EXACT playlist of the enormous dance party I am going to host once this pandemic subsides. I will also be sniffing around online for some kind of deeply obscene and obnoxious outfit to wear at my enormous party, and I'll be inventing various themed drinks, some alcoholic and others not, for my obnoxious, vainglorious guests and their horrified friends to savor WHILE WE DANCE OUR EXHAUSTED, DISGUSTING BODIES INTO THE GROUND. Fuuuuuck yes. This is my to-do list. Send outfit and song suggestions, please. Must be slutty.
Oh you want the slutty looks?! This is my calling:
https://iamgia.com/
https://www.jeblanc.com/
https://www.tlzlf.com/new-collection
https://kaicollective.com/shop/
https://www.klosetenvy.com/
Most if not all of these brands are also black owned.<33
OHHHHHH MY GOD. I am speechless. So much goodness here. Goodbye, day!
I’d like to recommend you include the Spice Girls’ Say You’ll Be There in your playlist. It’s pure joy with a harmonica solo.
Rachel Syme recently shared her GIGANTIC dance playlist on Twitter. She asked her followers to recommend any songs that they felt compelled to dance to whenever they came on. I fully support you making your own, but if you need any ideas it's currently 2 days long: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5F9GpvntTBPdmjOyirKgdz?si=A5sDvGnJSWOFwfmu7ZDSMA
Amazing, thank you!!!
I have been preparing for this for MONTHS! The funny thing is, I love whingeing (I'm French after all) about how I am such an introvert and stuff but honestly... I just want to dance and throw some ridiculous glam-rock parties. I have had a fair amount of solo dance parties in my loungeroom. Also, as a frog living in the land of Oz, I feel like I need to send everyone in your side of the world some joy.
So here is my modest contribution:
Prince - I Wanna Be Your Lover https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rp8WL621uGM
Electronic - Getting Away With It https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSfjtdnUsls
Love Unlimited - Under the Influence of Love https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UazqyfKhm-0
Earth, Wind & Fire - Fantasy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r58GQYFZeLE
The Flaming Lips - The Sound of Failure https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C8oGGgBK2xY&list=PL47E6F3FC6D739F0D&index=3
OH AND LET ME ALSO ADD that feeling joy in the moment sometimes depends on refusing to engage in unnecessary intellectual exercises that, when you take a minute to look more closely at them, aren't really bringing much of value to your life, at least not around the clock, every day. Are you a data analyst, for example? Are you personally in charge of strategizing for the DNC? Is the world asking you, repeatedly, WHAT WAS THIS ELECTION ABOUT ANYWAY? WHO MADE IT GO DOWN THIS WAY? WHOSE FAULT WERE THE MISTAKES AND WHO CAN TAKE CREDIT FOR THE VICTORIES? (If that's your boss saying that shit, please proceed accordingly.)
But for me? That's just Twitter. Do we need to be deeply engaged in a post-game analysis TODAY? After the four-year-long autopsy we've been living? No fucking thank you. We can just play loud music and dance, can't we? Or wrestle? Or hug a dog? Or sit in the sunshine? Motherfuckers LET'S DO THAT SHIT INSTEAD.
AND IT'S OFFICIAL. Fuck yes. JOY JOY JOY JOY. PURE JOY.
I'm sitting in a patch of sun on my balcony in a shockingly beautiful November day watching some 20-year-old girls down my alleyway singing 'Be OK' by Ingrid Michelson at the top of their lungs while dancing in their bras. Some guy is playing a saxophone further away and the smoke from someone's bong is diffusing beautifully. What I'm trying to say is that sometimes I love how the chaos strips things down. We're alive motherfuckers!
YEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSS yes yes yes yes! GODDAMN IT. Beautiful. I wish I lived on your block rn. But thanks for giving us a piece of it.
I'll keep you posted on important alleyway developments. For example- is the tuxedo cat really going to get that squirrel? Keep obsessivly refreshing the page every twenty seconds for updates.
This is a true upgrade to reloading Twitter for 72 hours, so I'll take it!
are you in Denver per chance? cause same lol
My virtual writing class has been the biggest source of joy in my entire life. Week 1 my best friend and I both in our 30s quickly learned that the writing group was all 70+. It has been amazing. Their confidence with technology has grown (first meeting no one could figure out how to get their cameras on) and everyone’s writing is improving significantly. The teacher is 80 and the smartest person I’ve ever met. Yesterday, one of the men wrote something sexist. She schooled him in the kindest most graceful way ever. Everyone’s writing is improving so much. One woman, Barbara, wrote about leaving a failed engagement. She didn’t share much about the relationship itself and my feedback was Barbara, that story is so interesting. I want to know more about your relationship! This week she reread the same piece but had added that he was bad at sex. It was incredible. She was grinning. JOY.
When it came my turn to share, I had written something very personal (it’s a memoir class) I asked, “how can you publish something knowing you can destroy someone’s life with it?” My teacher, knowing I am recovering from a long illness, said frankly, “Don’t. Get better first”. The freaking humanity in this woman. Do you know many times writing professors have told me to screw everyone and publish? She has changed everything for me. I love her.
Oh wow. She really knows. I agree, too - you can't take that on. Find your bearings first. And if you ever write that piece, it needs to be something you're sure you're proud of. Publish other stuff first, save that one for later. I have lots of stories I'll never publish anywhere because of the damage those stories would do. The more you write about your life, the better your compass gets. Envious of this class, though, it sounds so. good.
this sounds like such an amazing class; also sounds like your teacher is awesome too.
It’s very special :)
I went for a long walk in my neighborhood on maybe the best day for changing leaves and we collected our favorites in a bouquet as we walked. The mail carrier shouted to us in a thick accent how beautiful the leaves were in the neighborhood. We had a stilted conversation about autumn where we each struggled to understand each other completely but also were totally connected in the joy of it.
arrrrgh YES. perfect.
My friend is letting me paint her furniture! I am just painting shit!!
Finding joy in watching the MAGA crowd cry. Aside from that, I feel raw as hell. But for a while the fascists seemed invincible, so I'm enjoying finding out they're not.
I can’t take it in fully just yet. My brain understands the positive outlook and flashes of hope come, but my body isn’t fully on board with the new reality yet. Maybe I’m waiting to see a news network make the official call? Is chyron gonna go the trick? Something small and potentially silly will make it resonate in my body. I’m looking forward to that!
I took joy in my body this week. I have been trying to punctuate this week's doomscroll with displays of audacious fun. I hosted a "please please nevada-georgia-arizona-pennsylvania" noon solo dance party in my kitchen, and then I posted a video of me dancing with my cat to reggaeton in my teeny tiny running outfit (because its 75 degrees and sunny!) while taking giant swigs out of a bourbon bottle. And based on the likes the post got, I think I actually have okay ass-shaking abilities?!! Which totally makes my week.
might need a link to this!!
https://www.instagram.com/p/CHOMGNspRQZ/
NICE! love it
also love cat!
yes! spent most of the morning painting and then working on a drawing I started in the early '00s
Little flashes of joy keep coming at me today, in the form of videos and emails from some of my favorite creators, in the form of random fun e-conversations, in the form of just a prevailing feeling that somehow, some way, it's gonna be okay. And this post is one of those little flashes, so I'm grateful for it and for you, Heather.
I'm loving it all, and it feels like feeling true hope for the first time in a LONG time. I don't know if today is an inflection point and things will start to get imperceptibly better and better from here, but that's kinda what it feels like. I can't account for it, but I'm doing my best to accept it and own it as best I can. It feels like finally getting some goshdarn work done today, for once. It feels like wanting to make and read and watch and play ALL the things. There's not time to do all that now; there never is--so for now I'm just going to keep taking in these flashes of joy, for as long as they keep coming, and keep on looking for them even when they're less obvious.
Thank you for this post! I needed it. When things started looking up, I immediately began thinking about how hard the next four years are still going to be. I think it's almost a form of protection, like if I feel happy or relaxed for one goddamn minute something terrible is going to slip by without me noticing. So I really needed to be reminded to take the joy as it comes.
It can become a habit to brace for the worst. I grew up inside that habit (hence the name of my first book, Disaster Preparedness) but I didn't understand just how much of a toll it was taking on my outlook, my body, my friendships, my entire way of life, until pretty recently. Sometimes you need to stare straight down the barrel of the most terrible shit ever to understand that you've got to make due with whatever this shit heap of a life happens to deliver on any given day. Rejoicing in the tiny things you care about is part of that. And look, another part of it is just letting yourself feel incredibly shitty, too. You can do both! The more I invite the shit in, and then invite the joy in, and invite whatever the fuck there is around in, the better I feel. Welcoming what's here, that's the only way. Staying protected and safe will eventually drag you under. What's intense is that you can find a tiny glimmer of joy in *any* moment. You just stop and try to welcome everything you see and feel. There's a lot there, but trust me, joy is always somewhere in there, too. xo
Thank you thank you! I needed to hear all of this today, and to read everyone's wonderful responses. Today is a beautiful fucking day!
I wish you guys could see the memes Brazilians are making about this!
Post links, pls!
Well, for starters, Bolsonaro's son named his daughter "Georgia" in honor of the "traditionally republican state". So we are laughing our asses off about that. The Brazilian right wing is also VERY confused about the "vote fraud" in the US, because we use exclusively electronic voting machines in Brazil and they've been yelling for years about how they want paper ballots because they can't be frauded... People are also very happy someone played Brazilian funk music on Philly! https://twitter.com/eurenesilva/status/1324792305015029761?s=20
This is going on the dance party list for sure.
I can't find the version that's in that tweet. Send it if you have it!
That's "Baile de Favela", here's the Spotify link: https://open.spotify.com/track/5oNdTrafZ0joNCikz1Vdjd?si=HtIv7MzhQ7utc69S5Vk_qQ
HUZZAH, BITCHES.
I've been listening to a lot of joyous disco music since yesterday in anticipation of Biden getting 270. Good Times! I Feel Love! Let's Groove! September! I Want Your Love! Also Whitney, which isn't disco but is dancetastic. I stan the Philly ppl in the streets dancing and wearing Gritty and mailbox costumes! May their lives and the lives of ALL the people who organized and phone banked and knocked on doors and registered voters and protested for BLM be long and prosperous and blessed!
Edit: I realise this is election-related joy purely, and maybe being far away it's easier for us to feel it? Anyway – I'm in the UK and most of my friends and I have been glued to CNN since Tuesday and we are SO, SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! One friend yesterday burst into tears at the thought of Kamala Harris being the first Black VP in the US, which also almost brings me to tears, just thinking about it; others have been staying up all night to watch the vote counts. When Georgia turned blue we went crazy with delight and played the Mountain Goats' 'Going to Georgia'. Our UK politics group has momentarily stopped debating the merits of Jeremy Corbyn (seriously, thank you for this). We've been passing around tweets and tik-toks and articles and developing crushes on John King. But most of all, I repeat, we are SO HAPPY for you. Joyously so. I know it's not been called yet and I know the next eleven weeks, never mind the next four years, will be far from easy. Even so – we are here with you every step and will be celebrating so hard with you.
Printed this, to post visibly. Love the vibrancy of the image you selected.
YAAAS! Take it where you can find it.
Everyone in my family is getting Covid tested today so we can (hopefully) all see each other Sunday for the first time in many months. Today's results require celebration with loved ones. With any luck, there will be bloody mary's, and champagne, and bourbon and great food and football to be enjoyed. And hugs. Lots of motherfucking hugs.
I just learned that in England Kieran White has married Tilly Christmas. They are now Mr.& Mrs. White-Christmas. They met when they were 12. I love this so much I can hardly stand it.
Came here to say thank you, Heather, for the ups and downs throughout this entire year you have provided me with, as well as the presence and writerly joy you have provided your audience with since before I knew who you were. I keep sending people your articles and newsletters and links to places to buy your books because your voice is that resonant and important this year. Thank you a million times over and THANK YOU FOR CELEBRATING TODAY. I love you. That is all.
Ode to Joy
Joy, O Joy is where it’s at,
So get yourself some joy—go, cat!
Take your shot, grab that brass ring,
Then raise your glass, it’s time to swing.
Pal, the party just got going.
Aces are what you have showing.
Tell bad news to take a hike.
Tonight’s your night, do what you like.
Now you’re hip and now you’re smokin’.
These words are jake and not some token.
Try your moves out, feel the sound,
And spread that crazy joy around.
Joy O Joy is where it’s at,
So get yourself some joy—go, cat!
Take your shot, grab that brass ring,
Then raise your glass, it’s time to swing.
I spent the day driving around Grass Valley and Nevada City looking at the unbelievable fall foliage. It was psychedelic. We got some tea and listened to a Mahler symphony and some Freddie Hubbard jazz. A more low-key kind of celebration but one I won’t forget.
I discovered Sugarbee apples - which are amazing - and took a break from my work (home) to ride a Lime scooter down to the local bookstore, where I picked up a couple of books. Also stopped at the Italian market - chocolate - and am back home on this unseasonably warm MN day, hanging with my cats, while the cleaning person finishes the upstairs. Thanks for reminding me to be basic! I sometimes feel ashamed to admit it, but I feel like the Queen of Fucking Sheba in this very moment....
Oh, and our November surprise might be a new President, so how about them apples?!
For whatever reason, the rich sensations of what you describe stand out to me. The bright color, the cat fluffiness, the bookstore smell. The picture is more wholesome than a movie! Lime scooter! Joy!