Your writing actually really spoke to me when it came time to set resolutions and intentions, specifically the idea of living (hiding) in fantasies to avoid actually living. My top intention is "less fantasizing, more doing" -- this applies to my writing, friendships, dating, running, etc. Trying to have a year that reflects the simple idea that how you spend your days is how you spend your life, so doing the things you value regularly is very important!
I'm a big GOALS GIRLIE and consume all sorts of goal achievement and productivity content, but at the end of the day I am also a full-time working mom of two small kids -- so, this year I am really trying to embrace that my life as it is is FULL UP and I will NOT be taking on anything new. What I will be doing is tackling all my duties and responsibilities and pleasures with RELISH AND GUSTO. Relish translates into trying to adopt habits to remove friction and irritation (meal planning! grocery delivery! focused tidying sessions!). Relish means taking time to schedule out special time with each of my family members -- pay for babysitters, plan weekends away, doing the little annoying house projects or better yet pay someone else to do them! I have promises to keep and I intend to enjoy keeping them.
I'm 100% a process-not-outcome person. I'm realizing – thanks to your thoughts on it – that part of that is because I'm afraid to commit to goals. I'm afraid of the disappointment in myself if/when I don't reach them. It's easy to commit to process – I do art classes and writing classes and dance classes with no intention of ever showing, publishing, or performing. I don't think there's anything wrong with that – I've lived my many decades happily that way – but part of me has to admit that I would love to create art or writing that inspired other people. (Dancing, nah, that's just something I feel inside me.)
So, I'm going to make 2024 my year to share my creations. Which should terrify me but somehow just feels right? Thank you. :)
I have two big goals: to finish my novel draft and to fall in love (ideally with a man, but I may get a dog in 2024 which would probably do the same thing)
I’ve noticed some other writers, and people with careers I admire, note that their goal is to do less. This is very admirable, and I understand the intent, but I feel like I can’t do less, because there’s still so much I want to do with my life. It’s such a hard balance! Because if I don’t slow down, I burnout.
SAME HERE. Screenplay, not novel, but YES to love. Funny, I was just saying out loud to the cats “I want these big things!”- Creative Nonfiction MFA scholarships and Big Love - right before reading your comment.
Love this!! I didn't set many nor did I reach any of my goals for writing or business in 2023, and ended the year extremely burned out. So this year I want to focus on healing the burnout, working *with* my new kids-in-school schedule instead of fighting against it, and work on accepting that I'm doing my best and just need to keep going. I want to feel ease, but I also want to feel accomplished and maybe not productive but proud of what I'm spending my time on. I want to feel that it's worthwhile, and need to figure out what metrics will give me that.
I have to be honest, when I first read the part in this post about being less ambitious in 2023, a little voice in me cried out, “Well, of course she can say that, she’s already hugely successful. Most of us haven’t already published multiple books and aren’t being asked to give talks at universities.”
Enter my goal for 2024: work towards healing the place this little voice comes from, and towards feeling more secure about myself and my practice. Writing goals that are set in terms of a word count are fairly simple; moving past the feelings of resentment and inadequacy about my achievements that prevent me from being able to actually write, that is much more complicated.
I hear you. I have finally finally come to a point to believe that our worth is not tied to our achievement. That’s a big step for me toward letting go of performance-based goals. I would like to start feeling my way forward, gauging my progress on whether I’m true to myself. And less judging, toward myself and others.
I love this. And the thoughts in the comments! I'm coming to terms with the idea that I LIKE doing things. And I especially like doing lots of little things. I mean, I've got a full-time 9-5, but I can't help but take on so many more little projects. It's fun! And yes, I do end up setting goals and doing too much and forgetting to check in with myself to make sure I'm enjoying the moment. But when it comes down to it, I think I'm just a goal-setting project-starter at heart. And maybe that's okay?
In 2024 I'm working on embracing the many little things and trying to arrange my life so I can dabble even more.
As for goals, I am working on remembering that I am a human BEING (one with ADHD, for that matter) rather than a human DOING. I’m working on building my being baseline up moment by moment, rather than focusing on doing doing doing.
I’m trying to give myself grace that I will set goals, inevitably get bored because I’m human, and work on something else for a while. No time is wasted, and all things learned are transferable.
Mostly, though, I wanna get really good at needlepoint.
My primary goal for the year is to be able to see myself, and those close to me, clearly...and to adjust whatever needs adjusting. I started by taking inventory of what needs adjusting based on my own intuition, after coming out of a year filled with physical and emotional turmoil. The two adjustments that came to me instinctually were to begin running, and to let myself feel my feelings, both of which I've been focusing on for the last month or two.
Instead of making resolutions this year, I did a values exercise with a "Live Your Values" card deck I found online...with the goal of basically just seeing what else I needed to adjust based on how I am (or am not) living in line with my values. The things that came out of that exercise are more intentionally focusing on my health, my creativity, and how I'm engaging with my local community.
This is maybe cheesy? I guess because it's a thing learned from working in the corporate world. But I implement big changes by making a literal timeline. I start at the end and I work backwards from there. If I want to hit a big milestone, I have to be able to see the plan for how I'm gonna get there. So I map it out whiteboard style with whatever needs to happen between where I am and where I need to go. And then I translate that to a calendar so that I can keep up with smaller milestones along the way.
When I hit a wall, I give myself grace and I take a break. Usually I've hit a wall because I'm burnt out or just really tired. I also reevaluate my timeline and see whether the deadline I set for myself is actually realistic or if I'm putting unnecessary pressure on myself.
I truly hate the idea of committing to something and then only following through with it simply because I made the original commitment. If it doesn't feel or seem right as I'm moving through, I take a break and see what needs adjusting....or I take a break and then never go back to it. I try to give myself grace when I give up on something—and I try to reflect on what the reasons are for having given up (usually because they're actually really good, valid reasons and not just because I'm a lazy asshole...even though sometimes I'm also just a lazy asshole! But I try to give myself grace for that too.)
Oh my gosh I was the same in 2023…ambition dwindled and I became ok, happy even, with things as they were while thinking well isn’t this what success is, being ok with what is now rather than always trying/wanting to do more? It was really nice but weird too, some how felt a little bit off. Was I just fooling myself? I feel the pull of ambition again, at least the tiny putter patter of it in the distance. I want to write more, a lot more. Maybe 2023 was a year of much needed rest ? Either way I am so happy to see written here exactly what I was going through!
I'm in a "do less" period of my life. I have a 1.5 year old and am trying for a second (and then that's it for the kid making). I often think of a letter response you wrote to a woman having her second. I'm just existing in the day to day. The ambitious years can come back in a bit. Right now I am doing less. I'm getting clients that pay the bills and don't require much brain power. I'm watching television whenever it suits me. I'm fine eating the same thing every week. That said, I love to read and want to return to reading more novels. I joined a new book club I like at the end of the year and so far that's keeping my accountable to at least finish one book every six weeks - and it feels good doing something I love that also feels like I'm accomplishing something (and gets me in a room with book-y ladies from time to time to socialize and drink wine - something also good for me!).
Create at least 1 new architectural artifact each working day.
Learn new skills like cooking from my wife
Be more involved with life by being present during every conversation. Treating the person I speak with as the most important person at that moment.
Take my wife's help in areas where I am weak like strategy and future planning. Help my wife in areas where she is weak like drafting emails, financial number work and execution of tasks.
How do you implement big changes when you have a habit of dragging your feet?
This is a core challenge for me. With the study of Vedanta, I have learned that this is a Tamasik tendency (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tamas_(philosophy). I need external accountability partners who can remind me about the big changes. Writing about my mental agitations with a daily practice of Morning Pages described by Julia Cameron in her book "The Artist's Way" helps. (https://juliacameronlive.com/basic-tools/morning-pages/)
When you hit the wall with a big project, what do you do to push through it?
Writing down what is known and what is unknown. Treat every writing as a draft that needs to be improved continuously, helps me get started. I ask for help by setting up recurring meetings with people who will keep me accountable towards the progress. I also recommend the Working Backwards Amazon process described in the book "Working Backwards" https://www.workingbackwards.com/
How do you commit to cultivating a full life when you’re a little bit of a commitment-phobe?
This is an ongoing challenge. It is not a one and done. It is not like a college degree that you get once and have for a lifetime. I feel cultivating a full life is daily continuous work like brushing your teeth or taking a bath. It is not a static goal that has a well defined path. It is not like climbing Mount Everest. It is more a process of learning, unlearning and re-learning. Asking yourself "this thought that I just had, does it help me?" Identifying mental drifts and writing them down as suggested in the book Zen Yoga by Dr. P. J. Seher is a practice I have started, that helps me be aware whether a thought is coming from my I(Intellect), E(Emotion), S(Sex) or M(Movement) section of the mind.
After decades of searching (since I was a teenager in the 80s) to figure out what the fuck is wrong with me, about a year ago I finally found it.
Last year was about connecting to all this wounded shit, and, well, meeting and falling in love with all the coping mechanisms that made no sense to me, and affected so much of my life.
This year, the work will be about healing all that. I'm a puddle of goo and rage, but when I look in the mirror these days, I no longer abuse the fellow looking back at me.
Oh, yeah, your question ... I'm gonna rinse the rot out of some wounds, and see what can be healed. What I might discover on the other side kind of excites me, but also doesn't really matter very much right now. There is food in the fridge, and there is love, and there is healing, and fuck yes that's enough.
Here's a wave, and a smile, and a cheer of encouragement. Cop-out answer, I know, but letting things just be whatever they are, somehow feels so right and proper, I can't be simultaneously true to where I'm at right now, and at the same time worry too much about getting the answers right.
I've been following you since the suck.com days, and since that's a few decades now, your writing held a light in the darkness more than once. Thanks for that. I hope the magic you make lights up your life too.
I hear you. In 2023, with the help of an experienced therapist, I realized I had trauma from when I was a baby. While you are a puddle of goo, I am a puddle of slime, if that makes sense (believe it or not, I wrote that in my journal 10 minutes ago before I got onto Substack and saw your comment. I guess turning into a puddle is a common phenomenon) Anyhow, be well and stay well. All the best in 2024. The small baby in me sees the big baby in you.
Kids are instinctively drawn to them, and spashing about is very instructive. However, the world often reacts to puddle splashing with shaming messages such as "You're making a mess", and "Who's going to clean that up?" and so forth.
We don't mind water as long as it's clean, but as soon as it gets messy everyone feels all squidgy.
Puddles seem so harmless (even the word promises fun), but are compelling and potent.
Splash on, fellow adventurer! May all our puddles bring joy.
I really dig that little character. My own biases picture 'goo' and 'slime' very differently, but you've rendered it very lovingly. It seems to be having a very therapeutic soak there.
Thanks for sharing that. Something for me to contemplate.
I still haven’t completely figured out wtf is wrong with me and I have been so afraid whatever it is, is unfixable. I am inspired by what you said about “I’m gonna rinse the rot out of some wounds, and see what can be healed.”
That imagery really resonates, makes me look at my situation differently, more gently, more hopefully.
Two things I found roughly a year ago that were a huge help to me:
C-PTSD: I had never heard of this before, and it really helped to explain a ton of things that had previously made no sense to me.
IFS Therapy: For me this became a way to make some sort of sense of the confused mess. Last year was mostly a process of journaling. In hindsight it feels like mostly prep work, though there was plenty of healing. This year, I feel more ready to do a deep dive into the underlying stuff.
I know what you mean about feeling unfixable. I no longer feel this way about myself, although I recognize that while wounds can be healed, some scars remain. Still, it feels so much better to have a sense of the work that needs to be done, rather than the powerless ignorance that came before.
I think I’m at a point where you were in 2023 (?) I used to be such a planner with big goals. And I was actually quite good at reaching those goals. The problem though: I was not self-aware of what I actually want and need. Accomplishing goals and keeping myself busy was my way of avoiding to confront myself and my mess. So for 2024, my intention is to do less. Be still. Stay soft. And honour my body. Cheers to everyone setting loving intention for themselves for the new year!
There's probably no publication I've been more influenced by than Ask Polly—my camera roll is riddled with screenshots. So here's a stab: My goal this year is to say no with every bit as much ease as yes. To write about the gifts of women seriously, earnestly and wholeheartedly because there's still a big fucking vacuum where that should be. To simplify. To noodle in my tenderness. To focus on myself instead of numbing out on people who can't deliver. To develop my power instead of giving it away. To be openly, enthusiastically, wildly surprised. To decant my spirit and make something real each day, whether it's writing or art or a chat.
Your writing actually really spoke to me when it came time to set resolutions and intentions, specifically the idea of living (hiding) in fantasies to avoid actually living. My top intention is "less fantasizing, more doing" -- this applies to my writing, friendships, dating, running, etc. Trying to have a year that reflects the simple idea that how you spend your days is how you spend your life, so doing the things you value regularly is very important!
I love this. And thanks for the reminder that how you spend your days is how you spend your life.
I'm a big GOALS GIRLIE and consume all sorts of goal achievement and productivity content, but at the end of the day I am also a full-time working mom of two small kids -- so, this year I am really trying to embrace that my life as it is is FULL UP and I will NOT be taking on anything new. What I will be doing is tackling all my duties and responsibilities and pleasures with RELISH AND GUSTO. Relish translates into trying to adopt habits to remove friction and irritation (meal planning! grocery delivery! focused tidying sessions!). Relish means taking time to schedule out special time with each of my family members -- pay for babysitters, plan weekends away, doing the little annoying house projects or better yet pay someone else to do them! I have promises to keep and I intend to enjoy keeping them.
I'm 100% a process-not-outcome person. I'm realizing – thanks to your thoughts on it – that part of that is because I'm afraid to commit to goals. I'm afraid of the disappointment in myself if/when I don't reach them. It's easy to commit to process – I do art classes and writing classes and dance classes with no intention of ever showing, publishing, or performing. I don't think there's anything wrong with that – I've lived my many decades happily that way – but part of me has to admit that I would love to create art or writing that inspired other people. (Dancing, nah, that's just something I feel inside me.)
So, I'm going to make 2024 my year to share my creations. Which should terrify me but somehow just feels right? Thank you. :)
I'm with ya @mermaid!
I have two big goals: to finish my novel draft and to fall in love (ideally with a man, but I may get a dog in 2024 which would probably do the same thing)
I’ve noticed some other writers, and people with careers I admire, note that their goal is to do less. This is very admirable, and I understand the intent, but I feel like I can’t do less, because there’s still so much I want to do with my life. It’s such a hard balance! Because if I don’t slow down, I burnout.
To fall in love is such a brave and great thing to have as a goal!!! Thanks for the permission and inspiration
SAME HERE. Screenplay, not novel, but YES to love. Funny, I was just saying out loud to the cats “I want these big things!”- Creative Nonfiction MFA scholarships and Big Love - right before reading your comment.
I hope you don’t burn out, just burn bright. 🫡
Love this!! I didn't set many nor did I reach any of my goals for writing or business in 2023, and ended the year extremely burned out. So this year I want to focus on healing the burnout, working *with* my new kids-in-school schedule instead of fighting against it, and work on accepting that I'm doing my best and just need to keep going. I want to feel ease, but I also want to feel accomplished and maybe not productive but proud of what I'm spending my time on. I want to feel that it's worthwhile, and need to figure out what metrics will give me that.
I have to be honest, when I first read the part in this post about being less ambitious in 2023, a little voice in me cried out, “Well, of course she can say that, she’s already hugely successful. Most of us haven’t already published multiple books and aren’t being asked to give talks at universities.”
Enter my goal for 2024: work towards healing the place this little voice comes from, and towards feeling more secure about myself and my practice. Writing goals that are set in terms of a word count are fairly simple; moving past the feelings of resentment and inadequacy about my achievements that prevent me from being able to actually write, that is much more complicated.
My big baby sees your big baby. Big baby solidarity.
Omg I love this. Namaste 🙏
I hear you. I have finally finally come to a point to believe that our worth is not tied to our achievement. That’s a big step for me toward letting go of performance-based goals. I would like to start feeling my way forward, gauging my progress on whether I’m true to myself. And less judging, toward myself and others.
I love this. And the thoughts in the comments! I'm coming to terms with the idea that I LIKE doing things. And I especially like doing lots of little things. I mean, I've got a full-time 9-5, but I can't help but take on so many more little projects. It's fun! And yes, I do end up setting goals and doing too much and forgetting to check in with myself to make sure I'm enjoying the moment. But when it comes down to it, I think I'm just a goal-setting project-starter at heart. And maybe that's okay?
In 2024 I'm working on embracing the many little things and trying to arrange my life so I can dabble even more.
First off--absolutely adore your writing.
As for goals, I am working on remembering that I am a human BEING (one with ADHD, for that matter) rather than a human DOING. I’m working on building my being baseline up moment by moment, rather than focusing on doing doing doing.
I’m trying to give myself grace that I will set goals, inevitably get bored because I’m human, and work on something else for a while. No time is wasted, and all things learned are transferable.
Mostly, though, I wanna get really good at needlepoint.
My primary goal for the year is to be able to see myself, and those close to me, clearly...and to adjust whatever needs adjusting. I started by taking inventory of what needs adjusting based on my own intuition, after coming out of a year filled with physical and emotional turmoil. The two adjustments that came to me instinctually were to begin running, and to let myself feel my feelings, both of which I've been focusing on for the last month or two.
Instead of making resolutions this year, I did a values exercise with a "Live Your Values" card deck I found online...with the goal of basically just seeing what else I needed to adjust based on how I am (or am not) living in line with my values. The things that came out of that exercise are more intentionally focusing on my health, my creativity, and how I'm engaging with my local community.
This is maybe cheesy? I guess because it's a thing learned from working in the corporate world. But I implement big changes by making a literal timeline. I start at the end and I work backwards from there. If I want to hit a big milestone, I have to be able to see the plan for how I'm gonna get there. So I map it out whiteboard style with whatever needs to happen between where I am and where I need to go. And then I translate that to a calendar so that I can keep up with smaller milestones along the way.
When I hit a wall, I give myself grace and I take a break. Usually I've hit a wall because I'm burnt out or just really tired. I also reevaluate my timeline and see whether the deadline I set for myself is actually realistic or if I'm putting unnecessary pressure on myself.
I truly hate the idea of committing to something and then only following through with it simply because I made the original commitment. If it doesn't feel or seem right as I'm moving through, I take a break and see what needs adjusting....or I take a break and then never go back to it. I try to give myself grace when I give up on something—and I try to reflect on what the reasons are for having given up (usually because they're actually really good, valid reasons and not just because I'm a lazy asshole...even though sometimes I'm also just a lazy asshole! But I try to give myself grace for that too.)
Oh my gosh I was the same in 2023…ambition dwindled and I became ok, happy even, with things as they were while thinking well isn’t this what success is, being ok with what is now rather than always trying/wanting to do more? It was really nice but weird too, some how felt a little bit off. Was I just fooling myself? I feel the pull of ambition again, at least the tiny putter patter of it in the distance. I want to write more, a lot more. Maybe 2023 was a year of much needed rest ? Either way I am so happy to see written here exactly what I was going through!
I'm in a "do less" period of my life. I have a 1.5 year old and am trying for a second (and then that's it for the kid making). I often think of a letter response you wrote to a woman having her second. I'm just existing in the day to day. The ambitious years can come back in a bit. Right now I am doing less. I'm getting clients that pay the bills and don't require much brain power. I'm watching television whenever it suits me. I'm fine eating the same thing every week. That said, I love to read and want to return to reading more novels. I joined a new book club I like at the end of the year and so far that's keeping my accountable to at least finish one book every six weeks - and it feels good doing something I love that also feels like I'm accomplishing something (and gets me in a room with book-y ladies from time to time to socialize and drink wine - something also good for me!).
I love your attitude. Raising kiddos is hard work and it’s good you’re taking some time to read and look after your own needs.
What are your goals for the year?
Create at least 1 new architectural artifact each working day.
Learn new skills like cooking from my wife
Be more involved with life by being present during every conversation. Treating the person I speak with as the most important person at that moment.
Take my wife's help in areas where I am weak like strategy and future planning. Help my wife in areas where she is weak like drafting emails, financial number work and execution of tasks.
Unlearn habit patterns that do not help me grow.
Continue daily study of Vedanta 1 hour daily between 4AM - 6AM (Sattvik hour) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sattva
How do you implement big changes when you have a habit of dragging your feet?
This is a core challenge for me. With the study of Vedanta, I have learned that this is a Tamasik tendency (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tamas_(philosophy). I need external accountability partners who can remind me about the big changes. Writing about my mental agitations with a daily practice of Morning Pages described by Julia Cameron in her book "The Artist's Way" helps. (https://juliacameronlive.com/basic-tools/morning-pages/)
When you hit the wall with a big project, what do you do to push through it?
Writing down what is known and what is unknown. Treat every writing as a draft that needs to be improved continuously, helps me get started. I ask for help by setting up recurring meetings with people who will keep me accountable towards the progress. I also recommend the Working Backwards Amazon process described in the book "Working Backwards" https://www.workingbackwards.com/
How do you commit to cultivating a full life when you’re a little bit of a commitment-phobe?
This is an ongoing challenge. It is not a one and done. It is not like a college degree that you get once and have for a lifetime. I feel cultivating a full life is daily continuous work like brushing your teeth or taking a bath. It is not a static goal that has a well defined path. It is not like climbing Mount Everest. It is more a process of learning, unlearning and re-learning. Asking yourself "this thought that I just had, does it help me?" Identifying mental drifts and writing them down as suggested in the book Zen Yoga by Dr. P. J. Seher is a practice I have started, that helps me be aware whether a thought is coming from my I(Intellect), E(Emotion), S(Sex) or M(Movement) section of the mind.
After decades of searching (since I was a teenager in the 80s) to figure out what the fuck is wrong with me, about a year ago I finally found it.
Last year was about connecting to all this wounded shit, and, well, meeting and falling in love with all the coping mechanisms that made no sense to me, and affected so much of my life.
This year, the work will be about healing all that. I'm a puddle of goo and rage, but when I look in the mirror these days, I no longer abuse the fellow looking back at me.
Oh, yeah, your question ... I'm gonna rinse the rot out of some wounds, and see what can be healed. What I might discover on the other side kind of excites me, but also doesn't really matter very much right now. There is food in the fridge, and there is love, and there is healing, and fuck yes that's enough.
Here's a wave, and a smile, and a cheer of encouragement. Cop-out answer, I know, but letting things just be whatever they are, somehow feels so right and proper, I can't be simultaneously true to where I'm at right now, and at the same time worry too much about getting the answers right.
I've been following you since the suck.com days, and since that's a few decades now, your writing held a light in the darkness more than once. Thanks for that. I hope the magic you make lights up your life too.
I hear you. In 2023, with the help of an experienced therapist, I realized I had trauma from when I was a baby. While you are a puddle of goo, I am a puddle of slime, if that makes sense (believe it or not, I wrote that in my journal 10 minutes ago before I got onto Substack and saw your comment. I guess turning into a puddle is a common phenomenon) Anyhow, be well and stay well. All the best in 2024. The small baby in me sees the big baby in you.
I think puddles are a useful analogy.
Kids are instinctively drawn to them, and spashing about is very instructive. However, the world often reacts to puddle splashing with shaming messages such as "You're making a mess", and "Who's going to clean that up?" and so forth.
We don't mind water as long as it's clean, but as soon as it gets messy everyone feels all squidgy.
Puddles seem so harmless (even the word promises fun), but are compelling and potent.
Splash on, fellow adventurer! May all our puddles bring joy.
Yes! May all puddles bring joy. Have a fantastic day Jim!
Yeah. You too!
Hey Jim, I painted this after our chat. Cheers to puddles of goo and slime 👏 https://open.substack.com/pub/iamnat/p/730-tangerine-and-friends?r=2bak38&utm_medium=ios&utm_campaign=post
That's a great image.
I really dig that little character. My own biases picture 'goo' and 'slime' very differently, but you've rendered it very lovingly. It seems to be having a very therapeutic soak there.
Thanks for sharing that. Something for me to contemplate.
Thanks for this.
I still haven’t completely figured out wtf is wrong with me and I have been so afraid whatever it is, is unfixable. I am inspired by what you said about “I’m gonna rinse the rot out of some wounds, and see what can be healed.”
That imagery really resonates, makes me look at my situation differently, more gently, more hopefully.
Two things I found roughly a year ago that were a huge help to me:
C-PTSD: I had never heard of this before, and it really helped to explain a ton of things that had previously made no sense to me.
IFS Therapy: For me this became a way to make some sort of sense of the confused mess. Last year was mostly a process of journaling. In hindsight it feels like mostly prep work, though there was plenty of healing. This year, I feel more ready to do a deep dive into the underlying stuff.
I know what you mean about feeling unfixable. I no longer feel this way about myself, although I recognize that while wounds can be healed, some scars remain. Still, it feels so much better to have a sense of the work that needs to be done, rather than the powerless ignorance that came before.
I wish you the very best on your healing journey.
Thank you, for all of this. Best wishes to you too.
I think I’m at a point where you were in 2023 (?) I used to be such a planner with big goals. And I was actually quite good at reaching those goals. The problem though: I was not self-aware of what I actually want and need. Accomplishing goals and keeping myself busy was my way of avoiding to confront myself and my mess. So for 2024, my intention is to do less. Be still. Stay soft. And honour my body. Cheers to everyone setting loving intention for themselves for the new year!
There's probably no publication I've been more influenced by than Ask Polly—my camera roll is riddled with screenshots. So here's a stab: My goal this year is to say no with every bit as much ease as yes. To write about the gifts of women seriously, earnestly and wholeheartedly because there's still a big fucking vacuum where that should be. To simplify. To noodle in my tenderness. To focus on myself instead of numbing out on people who can't deliver. To develop my power instead of giving it away. To be openly, enthusiastically, wildly surprised. To decant my spirit and make something real each day, whether it's writing or art or a chat.
I'm sorry I'm late but I want to play too.
I want to keep things simple. I have enough to do.
So this year, I plan to continue with a few worthy projects, rather than throw in the towel. That will take some work.
I might let a few other things slide.
I wish everyone else the best with their goals for 2024.