20 Comments
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Nonaaa🍁's avatar

Loved the part about how being around people even when they drive you nuts is good for you. Sometimes I feel like we rob ourselves of beautiful experiences and people in the name of “protecting our peace” but of course there’s nuance to everything and some people should be avoided LOL happy new year everyone!!

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Humberto Moreira's avatar

"Feel what you feel without turning it into a problem or project"

"No one gets anywhere or does anything worthwhile without being a flailing novice for years first"

"Endure the trials and tribulations of showing up for those communities in spite of their many taxing traits"

Words to live by!

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Rachel Wheeley's avatar

Being able to chat with people who also read Ask Polly would be rather wonderful. I am not a joiner, but mostly because I fail to find things in common (like, actually in common rather than performatively in common) with a lot of people. That’s because I don’t believe most people want to talk about psychology and/or philosophy most of the time. Perhaps this community might?

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Kyle Garvey's avatar

I've heard kids nowadays do Discord. Maybe there could be an 'Ask Polly' one of these? Something more chat/informal/followable than another Medium comment?

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Lisa's avatar

I’m a musician isolated in the mountains of North Carolina (with sketchy WiFi and cell service) but would be interested in being part of a community of other like-minded Polly/Molly people.

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MV's avatar

I really like this, especially the idea of creating a community. Would love to meet like-minded people.

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Franklin's avatar

BEGINNER’S MIND. A tai chi teacher decades ago taught us to appreciate beginner’s mind—that once you’re skilled at something you can never again experience the newness, awkwardness, tentativeness of practicing something brand new. To revel in that childhood freshness of watching your mind and body working so hard to do something badly, which with enough repetition will become unconscious, effortless.

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Franklin's avatar

Apropos AMBIVALENCE, Ezra Klein today published “This Question Can Change Your Life” in the NYT. Opens with:

Something I’ve been working on over these past months and years is being able to sit with doubt. And not just doubt — being able to sit in the wonder of uncertainty. Because the first person we believe is ourselves: the stories we tell, the things we think we already know.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/02/opinion/ezra-klein-podcast-stephen-batchelor.html

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Franklin's avatar

Free link: https://archive.ph/jDAr5

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Ever Bloom's avatar

I’m such a committed lurker rather than a commenter, but inspired by your post I have come to say - YES to all this - and thank you so much for saying so (not to mention all your other outstanding contributions over the last year), and especially I would love to build deeper community bonds here ❤️

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Joanna Bourke Lawlor's avatar

I'm in Dublin Ireland if there any Pollys around!

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Kelly Barrett's avatar

I loved this, particularly the sobriety section which I very much related to.

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Libby's avatar

This is so great, and it is very “seize the day” in the least intimidating way. And I am going to quote you back to yourself, as this is something I copied into my notes that you wrote some time ago and that I refer back to when I need to get over my hesitancy: “I guess technically life gets shorter and shorter, but it’s best not to think of it that way if you don’t want to feel increasingly panicked until you’re dead.” - Heather Havrilesky

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Kate's avatar

SF Ask Polly chapter, anyone?

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Jolie Moore's avatar

I'm jealous that you can still drink! I hit perimenopause and suddenly couldn't hold a single drink without ruining my night and the next day.

I mostly miss wine with a meaty dinner...alas.

I admire your goal to build community. I had done so well, but then lots of people (ahem) left California during Covid.

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Franklin's avatar

Greater Boston Pollys?

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Grace Drigo's avatar

This is fantastic 🩵

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Syd's avatar

Would be into an NYC/Brooklyn chapter of Polly followers, if anyone’s interested.

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